Monday, April 20, 2015

My Left-Brain, the Right's Saving Grace (or is it the other way around?)

I think I've finally given up
on the Two-Brain Theory
where in the womb I consumed my twin
but not wishing to be completely a-part
(and maybe sensing as twins are known to do
that I wasn't really all "together,"
which could lead to serious harm)
my twin's brain grew and developed
- plum sized -
beside my own
intent on protection
of course, there is no evidence to substantiate
a double heart beat ever existed
and so it seems only logical to let this go.

I've also - for the most part -
given up on my Tumor Theory
mainly because if it were true
well, I'd be dead by now.

And so I've come to the most feasible answer
to my battling hemispheres
& why I feel like my creative half
more often than not
is stuffed inside an invisible box
pushing & shoving & kicking
just trying to get out.

why the battle?
why does my left brain insist on taking control?

For as long as I can remember
I've been plagued with irrational thoughts
whether a chemical imbalance
or perceptions of society's norms
interred & twisted within
I cannot say,
but they've always been there
forcing me into isolation
depression, anxiety, paranoia
'til breathing is like gulping water
that bleeds from the corners of my eyes.

And so, while I use to think
my "second" brain, in all of its infinite wisdom,
was there to counteract these detrimental thoughts
I've come to accept, that though born
with a dominate right hemisphere
my left has staged an uprising
to fight
logical against illogical.

& every once in awhile,
when the threat seems to subside
my right is allowed to roam free
and under the guidance of my left
expel these ills in a flow of words
allowing for but a moment
my left brain to finally breathe.

On inspiration for this piece: This idea was pulled from Poetic Asides's 2015 April PAD Challenge: Day 20. "For today’s prompt, take the phrase “My (blank), the (blank),” replace the blanks with a word or phrase, make the new phrase the title of your poem, and then, write your poem."


Vandana Sharma said...

A touch of sadness but of acceptance too.

Björn Rudberg said...

Intriguing trying to understand that battling between the halves battling..,somehow being caught in the middle.

Jennifer Wagner said...

This is brilliant.