Saturday, November 5, 2016

Letter to an 'Imaginary' Friend

I stopped by your place today
&                  you were gone

I knocked - not once, not twice, but
four times               just to be sure

& I shouldn't be upset, nor standing here
watering your lawn
but I realize it's been over two weeks
& I didn't even notice

& I know you haven't really been here
not completely
not for a while
but still there was also a sense of security
in hoping today
you might show

& now there is this finality &
I can't help myself
stupid, I know
when I myself had thoughts
of doing just this
disappearing
erasing myself from existence

& at the same time I feel the need
to thank you
yes, thank you
words haven't flowed like this in awhile
at least not the way
I've needed them to

& so here I sit writing this half-assed letter
like so many before
that I've never sent
but just threw out into the ether hoping
you would know
& understand
I was speaking of you...to you...with you

& maybe now I'll take pause and rethink
disappearing
fading away
erasing my presences from existence

Don't get me wrong
I'm still standing here
hoping it's not real
and upset
after all, I had at least intended
to say goodbye

Odd really
when there are dozens of people
who would wish that word from you
& I would only garner...
well I'm guessing not even you.

So stupid really
to be effected so
but seeing the world through my eyes
has always been blurred with tears
while seeing the world through yours
was like gazing into a kaleidoscope

& so though it matters not,
not really,

goodbye.

Friday, April 1, 2016

One Day Never Comes

I need to believe
my silence
                   echoes
                           echoes
                                   echoes

     To believe such
     means my words
[[[captured in each reverberation]]]
     have worth

That I
           I
              I
                 echo



It's been almost a year...30 days shy actually...but it's National Poetry Month...it seemed only right to write.

on unearthing titles:  this piece is a response of sorts to a previous piece...it begins "one day / my silence / will echo" & for some reason, as I think of this opening, a song that has always kind of reverberated in my head came to mind "someday never comes" by Creedence Clearwater Revival.  I guess in this case it kind of encapsulates my fear that "one day" too will never come.

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Echos of Silence

Silver Pearls
(photo by rmp, that's me)
[check out original unedited version @ rmpInFocus]

one day
             my silence
                             will echo

it will start as a whisper
of something forgotten
as you walk into a room
and look about
for what?
you can't remember
it will nag at you
until you shake off the whisper
figuring
it will eventually come back to you

it will grow to a soft hum
of a once heard song
that lingers at the edge
of your mind
you can feel the notes clash
refusing to take form
it will tickle your senses
until you push away the hum
back
into the recesses of your mind

one day
             my silence 
                             will echo

it will build within you to a shout
that whisper
that hum
will finally take shape
into words long ago read
and you'll be drawn
to rediscover them
as you begin to search for me
the nagging whisper will return
as you find my lost words
the tickling hum will resurface
it is then
that my silence will be so profound
it will echo deep within your mind

one day
             my silence 
                             will echo

of this i have no doubt
for there is no room 
for doubt
it is not something i can afford
my words have power
meaning
passion
these are things i cannot afford to loose
they are at my very core
without them i am nothing
and so i cling to the idea 

one day
             my silence 
                             will echo





A bit of rambling:  I dug up this poem from just shy of two years ago (July 4, 2011).  While I don't my silence has been long enough to echo for most, these still fingers and dormant words are quite profoundly echoing in my head.  At first life just too crazy, but now that things have settled down I find myself completely unmotivated.  Sure I could blame the elusive muse that most artistic types speak of, but I'm not the artistic type--I suffer from a left-brain logical dominance (at least most of the time).  So really it is lack of motivation, hopefully my right-brain will decide to come out and play soon.  In the meantime, I'm going to catch up on my reading (my reading list currently sits waiting for me with 63 unread posts all full of what I'm sure is amazing poetry).  Hopefully a little light (or not so light in some cases) reading will help jump start me.

On a side note:  When I dug up this poem, I had to smile at the original note on the bottom, "a One Stop Poetry--One Shot Wednesday offering."  This was my second to last contribution to OSP's One Shot Wednesday and my fourth to last offering to OSP before they closed their doors.  While the link to onestoppoetry.com no longer works, I got another brief smile today by adding in "blogspot," which brings up the original blog with its last post (though not the final post for OSP) dated Friday, January 28 2011 -- Friday Poetically with Brian Miller; unfortunately it last for only about 11 second (yes, I did actually time it) before the automatic redirect tries to link to the non-blogstop blog and I get "Oops! Google Chrome could not find onestoppoetry.com."  Sad, but I know I can always console myself with a tasty pint of poetry now served by Brian Miller and Claudia Schoenfeld or any number of talented pub tenders at dVerse Poets Pub. I'm getting a tad thirsty just thinking about it...

The Recording:  Creating this had me missing Aviary's editor--it was much more user-friendly to someone who knows nothing about editing sound tracks; I found it much easier to toy with the sound compared to Audacity, but unfortunately they felt the need to close down all of their free products to focus on their photo editing...which I also use so I can't complain too much.

Behind the image (title):  I realize I probably could have come up with a better title for my image, but there is just something about those silver pearls (which were not originally silver) that just draws me in.